Saturday, November 27, 2010

Listen to the Music Play

Dear John,
I have been keeping a secret from you for the past eight months and I don’t know how I may say this in a way where you heart wouldn’t fall and break into pieces. John I love you and you know that and I would never mean to hurt you in any way and I thought everything was going to be okay but I was wrong. You are the love of my life and you still are in so many ways I can’t even write them because when I think of them I would have to run and run to where you are and I can’t. I don’t want to lie anymore and I don’t want you to live a life where you can’t accept. I have been gone for the past eight months and that you know; I am not in Singapore anymore and I am very sorry but you must live a life where you don’t need to do anymore waiting. I won’t be coming back to Chicago anytime soon. I love you! So much! I am in a town where nothing but hell is observed. This letter is being read by the head of the town and certain information isn’t allowed to be told but I am allowed to tell you that I won’t be leaving this town for a very long time. I don’t know what I have done and I don’t know how to save myself but I want you to save yourself. Travel to the most beautiful cities in the world, dance to the most amazing music, and eat the most fabulous food the world can offer. My time has gone by so fast I didn’t have time to see it. Even though you’re going to find yourself in hell and find yourself confused but please do this for me. I will meet you somewhere sometime and to my love of my life I want nothing but to see smiles come toward me when I go near the most beautiful man on earth. This is the end of a beginning and I can’t say this enough John, but I love you.
I can’t put my pen down for some reason. I want to keep writing as I feel I am closer to you as possible right now. You changed my life, you are the first man who ever told me how beautiful I was, the first man who asked for my hand in marriage, the first man who taught me how to bake a real cheese cake, and the first man who would lie in bed with me for a whole weekend. I had it all and you gave it to me and I thank you so much. I have to go John. I will see you soon.
With love,

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